Tue, 20 Jun 2006
Quick DVD Roundup 6/19
Yet Another QDR. The last one seemed to work well, so I thought I'd repeat the format instead of breaking each movie out into it's own review.
Mondovino - ***
Man, this was a poorly made documentary, even shitty at parts. It even dragged on for 40 days, like the rain on Noah's speedboat. . . But after the 3DMT™ I was still thinking about it. In a nutshell, it's a movie about wine - but from an industry standpoint. It's a documentary, and it's about 4000 hours long, but it's pretty good. The first half is the better than the second, but they (barely) manage to keep it interesting, and me interested. There's a lot of stuff that'd be easy to use as fodder for arguments so I'd like some of you to see it and then shoot me an email afterwards to tell me what you thought. You'll never look at Mondavi the same way.
Taking Lives - *
I hope I'm not giving anything away in this but Angelina does get naked for a minute in this. Oh, and there's a decent story about a serial killer. This movie stars two odd-ear'ed actors: Ethan "I ruined Uma's Life" Hawke and Kiefer "I filmed my scenes in 6 hours" Sutherland. I have a problem with the movie though- there are major plot holes in this, one of them being Ethan putting his thingy in Angelina's plot hole. I'll give it one star because I got to see a character I hate get stabbed, and another for nudity. Let's face it, we need more nudity- you think I'm wrong? The news pastes Zawqari's corpse on TV and CSI reruns have bodies or parts everywhere- we need some balance people! C'mon.
Back to the movie though- it's really not that great, but guys like Angelina (I don't too much, she violates my tattoo rule) and girls will like the boys of the flick- Ethan, Kiefer, and Olivier Martinez. Oh, and Tchéky Karyo too! I really wanted to like this and was disappointed- I rented it because the director is the same guy who did The Salton Sea, plus it had Tchéky Karyo and Jean-Hugues Anglade!! You remember JHA? The king in Queen Margot? Or perhaps Eric from Killing Zoe? How did this flick go so wrong? The opening scene was so damn good. Oh well.
EDIT: screw it, I'm taking away a star, only one for you TL
Spanglish - **
I was going to give this two stars, but it's a better flick than Taking Lives. . .
EDIT: I bumped it down because I updated the TL review
Paz Vega mmmmm. She's so damn good in this. Let's get one thing out of the way first-- her character (and her character's sister, played by Cecilia Suárez) are impossibly hot. It's crazy and I found it distracting. But then again, maybe it's me and my uhhh predilections. Basically this is a just-slightly-better-than-cable RomCom that's meant to show off a lot of great relationships. Tea Leoni's really good, but you want to put her in a fleece vest and slap her silly- which shows how good she is. Cloris Leachman's good too. Oh, but Paz. . . I'd type "le sigh" here, but Angie says I can't say that anymore. . . (I did say RomCom though, ewww) Biker Boyz ** This movie has a ton of stars and no plot holes so it ties Taking Lives. It's kinda like a western-meets-oedipus-meets-superbikes, but it's surprisingly entertaining. Actually, now that I think about it, if the characters in this flick had ridden to Montreal to interfere with the case that Angelina was working on in TL, it'd be the bestest movie evar!! Ocean's Twelve - 0 Shit Sandwich Cold Mountain * Cold Mountain if it were on IRC:
Nicole joins channel #south jude_law1: a/s/l? nicole: i don't type that, I'm a lady jude_law1:proper? omg ur hot nicole:orly? jude_law1:yarly nicole:msg me for private chat! -:-NetSplit: irc.south.net split from hub.north.net.us Jude_law1 has left the channel nicole:omg where u go? Jude_law1 has joined #south nicole:omg I thought you left jude_law1: hehe sorry, I'm getting ready to go fight war nicole: I hate teh WoW jude_law1: nah, it's the real war, ok I luv you but I'm going now Jude_law1 has left the channel badguy: it's ok, he's gone, but I'm hot too. a/s/l? dcc me yur pics! jejeje! nicole: omgwtf nicole msg jude_law1 hey where are u? nicole msg jude_law1 when u come bak? away : jude_law1 - is away : (fighting teh yankees) nicole: hrm badguy: you wanna priv chat? nicole has left the channel nicole has joined channel #south nicole: !seen jude_law1 dixiebot: jude_law1 was last seen in channel #south 1460 days ago badguy: he's still not back, wanna cyber? nicole: le sigh jude_law1 has joined channel #south badguy: aww shit jude_law1: wtf shit? badguy: I wan yur lady jude_law1: bak off, you go play WoW liek teh Koreans omg lolz badguy:fu nicole:omg I miss u! jude_law1: omg me too I priv msg you but I was gone. wanna cyber? badguy: f u jude_law1:fu2! jude_law1 stares at badguy badguy: stop mofo! badguy slaps jude_law1 with a frozen trout jude_law1: omgwtfbbq badguy was kicked off #south by jude_law1 (stfu) jude_law1 was kicked off #south by dixiebot (kickban no chanops) jude_law1 has joined channel #south nicole: omg ur back! jude_law1 hearts nicole nicole hearts jude_law1 SignOff jude_law1 #south (Remote host closed the connection) nicole: omgwtf?!
20 Jun 00:43 | /movies | 7 comment(s)
